by Marc Rosenberg
"And we heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight, 'Happy training to all, and to all a good night!'"
'Twas the night before rollout and all 'cross the floor,
trainers were scurrying to get the course out the door.
With stuff scattered about with no reason or rhyme,
they still hoped it would all come together on time.
Instructors were nestled all snug in their beds,
while visions of full classrooms danced in their heads.
Designers were making their last minute tweaks,
hoping to stay clear of the programmer geeks.
Dozens of objectives written that few will read,
500 slides ready, just in case there's a need.
Handouts are copied with that sweet Xeroxing sound,
and put into binders weighing more than 10 pounds.
We remember how it started some 12 weeks ago,
we were just sitting around, as the workday was slow.
When all of a sudden there appeared such a clatter,
we sprang up and ran out to see what was the matter.
The business was in crisis, a course had to be done,
or the world would end, and that's no fun.
Our VP came today to speak to us all,
and we listened intently to her clarion call:
Now designers! Now developers!
Now SMEs too!
Now artists! Now programmers!
Now instructors old and new!
Now IT! Now HR!
Now departments big and small!
Now train away! Train away!
Train away all!
Then sometime last month the course was upended,
when the boss decided it all must be blended.
This wasn't the first time it was all torn apart,
the team had a tendency to put horse after cart.
Today it's loaded on the LMS with care,
in hopes that enrollments soon would be there.
The course was great, there was nothing it lacked,
except we forgot just one simple fact.
We never talked to the client, not once, it's true,
so we never found out that their strategy was through.
Their business had changed and had all turned around,
the course we had built was no longer sound.
Nobody told us, we put our heads in the sand,
we only wanted to make our course grand.
We have lots of cool stuff but won't meet the need,
it's great to look at but useless, indeed.
Now the night before rollout we still have no clue,
that the course will fail miserably, there's nothing we can do.
Although interactivity's such a beautiful thing,
we ignored the first rule, that content is king.
As we shut down the office to go drink and have fun,
our manager took off, saying job well done.
And we heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight,
"Happy training to all, and to all a good night!"
PROCESSING, PLEASE WAIT...